fazaal24
01-25-2007, 01:40 PM
>In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed
>through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on
>consumer goods.
>
>
>On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) --
>"Do not turn upside down."
>(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
>
>
> ==========================
>
>
>On Sainsbury's peanuts --
>"Warning: contains nuts."
>(talk about a news flash)
>
> ===========================
>
>
>
>
>On Boot's Children Cough Medicine --
>"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking
>this medication."
>(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we
>could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)
>
>
> ==========================
>
>
>
>On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding --
>"Product will be hot after heating."
>(...and you thought????...)
>
>
> =======================
>
>
>
>On a Sears hairdryer --
>Do not use while sleeping.
> (That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)
>
> ====================================
>
>
>
>On a bag of Fritos --
>You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
>Details inside.
>(the shoplifter special?)
>
>
> ===========================
>
>
>On a bar of Dial soap --
>"Directions: Use like regular soap."
>(and that would be???....)
>
>
> ============================
>
>
>
>
>
>On some Swanson frozen dinners --
>"Serving suggestion: Defrost."
>(but, it's just a suggestion.)
>
>
>
> ========================
>
>
>
>On packaging for a Rowenta iron --
>"Do not iron clothes on body."
>(but wouldn't this save me time?)
>
>
>
> ==============================
>
>
>
>On Nytol Sleep Aid --
>"Warning: May cause drowsiness."
>(..I'm taking this because???....)
>
>
> ==============================
>
>
>
>
>On most brands of Christmas lights --
>"For indoor or outdoor use only."
>(as opposed to what?)
>
>
> ==========================
>
>
>
>On a Japanese food processor --
>"Not to be used for the other use."
>(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
>
>
> ==============================
>
>
>
>On an American Airlines packet of nuts --
>"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
>(Step 3: say what?)
>
>
> ===========================
>
>
>
>
>On a child's Superman costume --
>"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
>(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
>
>
> ========================
>
>
>
>On a Swedish chainsaw --
>"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
>(Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
>
>
> ===========================
>
>
>
>
>Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread
>the stupidity to someone you want to bring a smile to
>(maybe even chuckle)...
>
>
> =============================
>
>****Blessed are the cracked:
>for it is they who let in the light*****
>
>through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on
>consumer goods.
>
>
>On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) --
>"Do not turn upside down."
>(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
>
>
> ==========================
>
>
>On Sainsbury's peanuts --
>"Warning: contains nuts."
>(talk about a news flash)
>
> ===========================
>
>
>
>
>On Boot's Children Cough Medicine --
>"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking
>this medication."
>(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we
>could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)
>
>
> ==========================
>
>
>
>On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding --
>"Product will be hot after heating."
>(...and you thought????...)
>
>
> =======================
>
>
>
>On a Sears hairdryer --
>Do not use while sleeping.
> (That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)
>
> ====================================
>
>
>
>On a bag of Fritos --
>You could be a winner! No purchase necessary.
>Details inside.
>(the shoplifter special?)
>
>
> ===========================
>
>
>On a bar of Dial soap --
>"Directions: Use like regular soap."
>(and that would be???....)
>
>
> ============================
>
>
>
>
>
>On some Swanson frozen dinners --
>"Serving suggestion: Defrost."
>(but, it's just a suggestion.)
>
>
>
> ========================
>
>
>
>On packaging for a Rowenta iron --
>"Do not iron clothes on body."
>(but wouldn't this save me time?)
>
>
>
> ==============================
>
>
>
>On Nytol Sleep Aid --
>"Warning: May cause drowsiness."
>(..I'm taking this because???....)
>
>
> ==============================
>
>
>
>
>On most brands of Christmas lights --
>"For indoor or outdoor use only."
>(as opposed to what?)
>
>
> ==========================
>
>
>
>On a Japanese food processor --
>"Not to be used for the other use."
>(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
>
>
> ==============================
>
>
>
>On an American Airlines packet of nuts --
>"Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
>(Step 3: say what?)
>
>
> ===========================
>
>
>
>
>On a child's Superman costume --
>"Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
>(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
>
>
> ========================
>
>
>
>On a Swedish chainsaw --
>"Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
>(Oh my God..was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
>
>
> ===========================
>
>
>
>
>Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread
>the stupidity to someone you want to bring a smile to
>(maybe even chuckle)...
>
>
> =============================
>
>****Blessed are the cracked:
>for it is they who let in the light*****
>